How about some doctor doctor jokes...
Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I am a set of curtains!
"Pull yourself together, man!"
Doctor, doctor, people tell me I'm a wheelbarrow.
"Don't let people push you around."
Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I'm invisible.
"Who said that?!"
Doctor, doctor, nobody understands me.
"What do you mean by that?"
Doctor, doctor, People keep ignoring me!
"Next!"
Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pack of cards.
"I'll deal with you later."
Doctor, doctor, people keep telling me I'm ugly!
"Lay on the couch, face down."
Doctor, doctor, I'm manic-depressive.
"Calm down. Cheer up. Calm down. Cheer up. Calm..."
Doctor, doctor, I feel so short!
"No problem. Hop up on the couch."
Doctor, doctor, I feel like a small bucket.
"You do look a little pail."
Doctor, doctor, I've only got 59 seconds to live.
"Wait a minute please."
Doctor, I have a ringing in my ears.
"Don't answer!"
Sunday, April 30, 2006
Friday, April 28, 2006
Let's hear it for "Colie" and "Shelee"
Hey, at least I’m not writing about TOES like my brother is on his blog. However, he did have something momentous happen with his toes, he dropped a heavy table on them. Ow, Ow, Ow. That’s gotta hurt.
When I asked in the last blog what people were reading, one of my nieces replied that she’s reading Jane Eyre. Again. For the 2nd or 3rd time. I’m so impressed with this young woman-she’s going to K State and having the time of her life. She’s always struck me as a balanced person-someone who wants to try everything, but yet maintains perspective and a focus toward life goals. It’s been a privilege for me to watch her and her equally charming sister grow up. You girls are terrific!”
When I asked in the last blog what people were reading, one of my nieces replied that she’s reading Jane Eyre. Again. For the 2nd or 3rd time. I’m so impressed with this young woman-she’s going to K State and having the time of her life. She’s always struck me as a balanced person-someone who wants to try everything, but yet maintains perspective and a focus toward life goals. It’s been a privilege for me to watch her and her equally charming sister grow up. You girls are terrific!”
Thursday, April 27, 2006
Not much here...
Well, what do I want to write about…work? Work’s work. Wrapping things up. School? School’s school. Wrapping things up. There’s a lot going on, and the next three weeks will be both exhilarating and exhausting.
How about if I write about stuff that doesn’t matter much to anybody else…let’s see. Need to plant some canna bulbs my brother gave me-maybe Saturday afternoon will work for that. The yard is a mess-it needs raking, mowing, trimming, all that good stuff.
Got my car outta the shop again today-the gas line had to be replaced. It was leaking and I lost 18 gallons of gas in 2 days. Ouch. My son has a job interview tomorrow at a bank.
For what it’s worth, that’s all there is. What are you currently reading? Looking forward to reading this summer-I’m all for getting lost in a fiction book on a Saturday afternoon.
Talk to you all later, and thanks again for “tuning” in.
How about if I write about stuff that doesn’t matter much to anybody else…let’s see. Need to plant some canna bulbs my brother gave me-maybe Saturday afternoon will work for that. The yard is a mess-it needs raking, mowing, trimming, all that good stuff.
Got my car outta the shop again today-the gas line had to be replaced. It was leaking and I lost 18 gallons of gas in 2 days. Ouch. My son has a job interview tomorrow at a bank.
For what it’s worth, that’s all there is. What are you currently reading? Looking forward to reading this summer-I’m all for getting lost in a fiction book on a Saturday afternoon.
Talk to you all later, and thanks again for “tuning” in.
Sunday, April 23, 2006
30 years of marriage
Well, April 24 is a special day for me- I’ve been married, let’s see, I’ve been married 30 years as of tomorrow. Is that a long time or what?
I was going to try to write something elegant about this, but words are sorta failing me. I don’t see my husband a lot - the main reason is because he works two jobs in order to support me as I go to school. He has never complained about doing that - I’m so grateful for his support and encouragement.
What’s it like to be married for 30 years? Well, it’s comfortable. It’s a good routine. It’s secure. And, you’ve got the whole issue of taking each other for granted, but that’s another subject for another time.
For right now, this Sunday evening, I just want to say that I’m blessed to have him here with me. Thanks, dear, for all you do.
I was going to try to write something elegant about this, but words are sorta failing me. I don’t see my husband a lot - the main reason is because he works two jobs in order to support me as I go to school. He has never complained about doing that - I’m so grateful for his support and encouragement.
What’s it like to be married for 30 years? Well, it’s comfortable. It’s a good routine. It’s secure. And, you’ve got the whole issue of taking each other for granted, but that’s another subject for another time.
For right now, this Sunday evening, I just want to say that I’m blessed to have him here with me. Thanks, dear, for all you do.
Friday, April 21, 2006
Baby steps
Hey! I turned in the last report yesterday. To celebrate that I finally have completed the work for that class, I bought my graduation “regalia” at the bookstore. What a deal. Now the only thing I have to do is make sure I get in all the practicum hours I need to, but at least I won’t be trying to do class work as well.
I’ve got an interesting sort of project to tackle at work. The small town I work in is seeing a rise this year, and a dramatic one at that, in the number of teen pregnancies. A state BOE member has proposed an “abstinence only” based curriculum be taught in public schools in Kansas. In a meeting I was attending, someone asked if there was any scientific research which points to an abstinence only curriculum in human sexuality being more effective in curtailing teen pregnancy. Stunned looks all around, no one knew, so I was asked to see what I could find. I wonder if this board member has any researched based information to back up her assertion that this type of curriculum has had a better result. I hope so. I may have to email her and ask, but until then, I’ll look for myself and see what’s out there.
Well kids, time to get going. Now that I’m not so busy with school work, I may have time to write in here once in awhile. See ya later…
I’ve got an interesting sort of project to tackle at work. The small town I work in is seeing a rise this year, and a dramatic one at that, in the number of teen pregnancies. A state BOE member has proposed an “abstinence only” based curriculum be taught in public schools in Kansas. In a meeting I was attending, someone asked if there was any scientific research which points to an abstinence only curriculum in human sexuality being more effective in curtailing teen pregnancy. Stunned looks all around, no one knew, so I was asked to see what I could find. I wonder if this board member has any researched based information to back up her assertion that this type of curriculum has had a better result. I hope so. I may have to email her and ask, but until then, I’ll look for myself and see what’s out there.
Well kids, time to get going. Now that I’m not so busy with school work, I may have time to write in here once in awhile. See ya later…
Thursday, April 20, 2006
Stay tuned...I know I haven't written recently, but I may have news tonight. I've been working, working, working on reports for Personality Assessment, I have one to go, and there's a good possibility I'll get it done today. Yee haw, I will keep you informed. This may be the best day I've had all semester.
Saturday, April 15, 2006
3:00 am musings
I’m up at almost 3:00am. Normally at this time, I’m doing what most of us are doing, however, I’ve got two (only two??) problems. I’m coughing, and, the neighbors are up. The neighbors are up rather noisily although it sounds as though they are getting ready to call it a night.
It’s been warm, but I’m not turning the air conditioner on in April, sorry. It was 96 here on Thursday. I think yesterday it was only 89. But I’m NOT turning on the AC. The windows are open for breeze, and besides letting in a little air, they let in the sounds of beer bottles clinking into a paper bag as they are being picked up, slurred voices, and people who shouldn’t be walking across the street getting into cars and driving away. The party over, I hear sirens in the distance heralding a life changing moment for someone.
I’m a simple person of the soil (SPOTS), who lives in the middle of a large Midwestern city. I have a 50 foot by 75 foot plot of land with a house sitting on it, and neighbors all around. It’s noisy and it smells funny when the wind blows just right -the meat packing and rendering houses from the north and the sewer plant on the south remind me I’m really close to, well, close to “things”. My dad summed it up once while visiting my house soon after I bought it, “You can’t even pee in your backyard without anyone seeing you.” (He was really a SPOTS. For many years he lived on the edge of a small town on a couple of acres-just enough to say you owned some land, but not enough to say you have to “farm” it.) And for him, you have enough land between you and the guy who lives next to you if you can have enough privacy to pee outside if you want to (although you don’t just stand out in your field and do it, you find a tree or stand in an outbuilding with a dirt floor, you always do these things with decency and decorum, you weren’t born in a BARN for heaven’s sake…)
The coughing has subsided somewhat, my head is clearing, and the neighbors have called it a night at least outside, so I’m thinking about going back to bed. Come on breeze. It’s muggy and warm. If I were a SPOTS truly in a SPOTS’s home, I’d go sit on the porch in my nighclothes in the dark. Can’t do that here, the porch is lit like a beacon. If I turned the light off, I’d get robbed. I get robbed anyway, but…did I tell you that someone came over the fence into my yard and helped themselves to a 20 foot aluminum extension ladder we had back there leaned up against the back of our house? It was a nice one. It held my rather portly self quite nicely as I painted trim on the house, or hung Christmas lights up. Oh well. Time to call it a night.
It’s been warm, but I’m not turning the air conditioner on in April, sorry. It was 96 here on Thursday. I think yesterday it was only 89. But I’m NOT turning on the AC. The windows are open for breeze, and besides letting in a little air, they let in the sounds of beer bottles clinking into a paper bag as they are being picked up, slurred voices, and people who shouldn’t be walking across the street getting into cars and driving away. The party over, I hear sirens in the distance heralding a life changing moment for someone.
I’m a simple person of the soil (SPOTS), who lives in the middle of a large Midwestern city. I have a 50 foot by 75 foot plot of land with a house sitting on it, and neighbors all around. It’s noisy and it smells funny when the wind blows just right -the meat packing and rendering houses from the north and the sewer plant on the south remind me I’m really close to, well, close to “things”. My dad summed it up once while visiting my house soon after I bought it, “You can’t even pee in your backyard without anyone seeing you.” (He was really a SPOTS. For many years he lived on the edge of a small town on a couple of acres-just enough to say you owned some land, but not enough to say you have to “farm” it.) And for him, you have enough land between you and the guy who lives next to you if you can have enough privacy to pee outside if you want to (although you don’t just stand out in your field and do it, you find a tree or stand in an outbuilding with a dirt floor, you always do these things with decency and decorum, you weren’t born in a BARN for heaven’s sake…)
The coughing has subsided somewhat, my head is clearing, and the neighbors have called it a night at least outside, so I’m thinking about going back to bed. Come on breeze. It’s muggy and warm. If I were a SPOTS truly in a SPOTS’s home, I’d go sit on the porch in my nighclothes in the dark. Can’t do that here, the porch is lit like a beacon. If I turned the light off, I’d get robbed. I get robbed anyway, but…did I tell you that someone came over the fence into my yard and helped themselves to a 20 foot aluminum extension ladder we had back there leaned up against the back of our house? It was a nice one. It held my rather portly self quite nicely as I painted trim on the house, or hung Christmas lights up. Oh well. Time to call it a night.
Thursday, April 13, 2006
No whining allowed or "aloud" as the case may be...
It’s gonna be 90 degrees today! Is it summer? It feels like it. I am enduring a second round of coughing, sneezing, and congestion-I just got over it, now here it is again. And I know it sounds weird, but I can tell you exactly when and where I was when I first noticed that scratchy tickle in my throat- I was in a meeting at a school where we were discussing a preschooler’s readiness to enter kindergarten. Shortly after that my sinuses filled up, shortly after that the sneezing started, and within two hours, I had a full blown problem. Yesterday evening the body aches started, and by 10:00pm I was miserable. HOWEVER, I must state that there are others who battle physical illnesses every day of their lives so much worse than a bad cold. I should not devote blog space to whining about that when others are dealing with far worse. I’m thinking of you, G., and of someone I know who has liver cancer, and someone else with severe heart problems. God bless you today, if you are reading this and are suffering a debilitating illness. You’d probably exchange your problems with my cold malady any day of the week.
This is my last day to work this week at my school, but I’ll be working at home tomorrow on some things. It seems there are a lot of things for a school psychologist to do at the end of the year-finishing up evaluations would rank pretty high. In talking to some in this field, there isn’t enough time left in the year to complete those evaluations that were requested in February or March, so those will have to wait until next fall.
Next week I’m doing a Functional Behavior Assessment (look that up on the net) and am going to try to get to more of those benchmarks that are required in my practicum but which I haven’t done yet. There are like a million indicators you have to fulfill. Well, not that many, but it seems like it.
Gotta get going. The end is near…
This is my last day to work this week at my school, but I’ll be working at home tomorrow on some things. It seems there are a lot of things for a school psychologist to do at the end of the year-finishing up evaluations would rank pretty high. In talking to some in this field, there isn’t enough time left in the year to complete those evaluations that were requested in February or March, so those will have to wait until next fall.
Next week I’m doing a Functional Behavior Assessment (look that up on the net) and am going to try to get to more of those benchmarks that are required in my practicum but which I haven’t done yet. There are like a million indicators you have to fulfill. Well, not that many, but it seems like it.
Gotta get going. The end is near…
Monday, April 10, 2006
Good Monday Morning
Good morning! 6:00am on a Monday…and I’m sorta chipper. (Isn’t coffee an amazing drug?) I’m on the downhill slope to completion. I have, let’s see, six more weeks of practicum. Five weeks until graduation. Two weeks before all reports need to be done. Deadlines, deadlines. They don’t call ‘em “dead” for nothing. Sometimes by the time you reach a deadline successfully, you feel like you COULD be dead…
I haven’t said much about work at the practicum site recently. Last week I finished screening kindergarteners to ascertain readiness for first grade. This week I’m helping finish up evaluations, and in fact, need to do some testing. I think I’m going with a special education class to the zoo on the 21st-that’ll be an adventure. And, I’m hoping in doing that, I can check off a few more of those practicum requirements. Did I mention that for practicum there are 11 standards, and each standard has anywhere from 3 to 10 indicators that must be met in a semester? It takes like 2 hours just to check off what you’ve done for the week on the evaluation form.
On another subject, I didn’t get around to wishing my oldest child a happy birthday last week on the blog. We did take her and my son-in-law out to eat to celebrate, but I thought I should give her a line here. She was born on Easter Sunday 26 years ago, and her birthday has never fallen on Easter since. I looked it up one time on the ‘net, and she’ll be like in her 50’s before just the right combination of equinox, Sundays, and birthdays all roll around to be on Easter again.
I think that’s about it. Time to get rollin’.
I haven’t said much about work at the practicum site recently. Last week I finished screening kindergarteners to ascertain readiness for first grade. This week I’m helping finish up evaluations, and in fact, need to do some testing. I think I’m going with a special education class to the zoo on the 21st-that’ll be an adventure. And, I’m hoping in doing that, I can check off a few more of those practicum requirements. Did I mention that for practicum there are 11 standards, and each standard has anywhere from 3 to 10 indicators that must be met in a semester? It takes like 2 hours just to check off what you’ve done for the week on the evaluation form.
On another subject, I didn’t get around to wishing my oldest child a happy birthday last week on the blog. We did take her and my son-in-law out to eat to celebrate, but I thought I should give her a line here. She was born on Easter Sunday 26 years ago, and her birthday has never fallen on Easter since. I looked it up one time on the ‘net, and she’ll be like in her 50’s before just the right combination of equinox, Sundays, and birthdays all roll around to be on Easter again.
I think that’s about it. Time to get rollin’.
Saturday, April 08, 2006
I really don't hate everything-Part 2
It’s been said that life turns on a dime. Yes, yes, it does. This past week I was reminded again that God indeed can put puzzle pieces together and make them all fit perfectly.
On Tuesday I received word that I passed the licensing exam. Yee Haw! On Wednesday I received word from a school system I applied to that they wish to hire me as a school psychologist beginning Fall 2006. Woo Hoo! And, on Thursday, I was offered a summer job. Without even getting started on my job search, my phone rang, and opportunity knocked. I couldn’t have worked it out better myself. Ya Hoo!
So, let me encourage those of you who read these words, there’s hope. Some of you have big big struggles, bigger than exams and bigger than jobs. Some of you struggle with issues you’ve never told a soul about-but I’m here to tell ya, where people have failed you, God won’t.
Well, graduation is almost here…can you guys believe it? Congratulations to my fellow students, Barbara, Deb, and Sylvia. I appreciate you guys so much, and I’ve learned a lot from you. Those of you coming up to graduate next year-Crystal, Candice, Judy, Kris-thanks for your friendship, support, and listening ears as I’ve vented from time to time. You all mean the world to me.
On Tuesday I received word that I passed the licensing exam. Yee Haw! On Wednesday I received word from a school system I applied to that they wish to hire me as a school psychologist beginning Fall 2006. Woo Hoo! And, on Thursday, I was offered a summer job. Without even getting started on my job search, my phone rang, and opportunity knocked. I couldn’t have worked it out better myself. Ya Hoo!
So, let me encourage those of you who read these words, there’s hope. Some of you have big big struggles, bigger than exams and bigger than jobs. Some of you struggle with issues you’ve never told a soul about-but I’m here to tell ya, where people have failed you, God won’t.
Well, graduation is almost here…can you guys believe it? Congratulations to my fellow students, Barbara, Deb, and Sylvia. I appreciate you guys so much, and I’ve learned a lot from you. Those of you coming up to graduate next year-Crystal, Candice, Judy, Kris-thanks for your friendship, support, and listening ears as I’ve vented from time to time. You all mean the world to me.
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
Hate everything? Nah...not me...
Do I really hate everything as I stated in my last blog entry? No, no, I don’t really hate everything. I was just venting, letting off a little, oh, maybe negative energy. And I felt so much better after I posted it…posted for the world to see…which caused G, a lifelong compadre and devoted friend, to send me an email. After apologizing for her words, and saying, “I know you’re going to hate me for this , but here I go again…” , she writes, “Where is the joy and the gratefulness and the thankfulness, for the way God has provided, sustained, and walked you through everything to get to this point? Where is the realization that without God you can do nothing and that He has it all under control?”
Well said, G. And, if you don’t mind me saying so, “Ouch”. But see, I’m a person who pretty well lets it all come out verbally, I don’t hold back a lot. I am getting better in my old age-I sure don’t put my foot in my mouth clear up to my knee as much as I used to. But if you were to ask my family, they’d probably tell you the same thing. I have brothers, a sister, and many in-laws who can testify that yes, I’m a transparent person, and there’s usually no guessing how I feel about a subject. I’ve heard it said, “I don’t get ulcers, I GIVE them.” That’s the way “venters” are. We just have to get all the frustration out, then we feel great. Everyone else is in shreds, but, hey, we’re doin’ just fine-what’s YOUR problem????
So, every once in awhile, my frustrations surface, and out it comes. I’m not making excuses, and it’s not what I should be doing. But it’s all about perspective, and that’s why I’m grateful to G and everyone else who helps me balance. There are days I feel like I’m walking a pretty thin tightrope of sanity, but if I can just put one foot in front of the other and walk on, I’ll be okay.
This week and part of next I’ll be screening kindergarteners to determine if the little buggers are ready for first grade. I hope I can keep the germs and viruses at bay while I’m testing. Have a good week all.
Well said, G. And, if you don’t mind me saying so, “Ouch”. But see, I’m a person who pretty well lets it all come out verbally, I don’t hold back a lot. I am getting better in my old age-I sure don’t put my foot in my mouth clear up to my knee as much as I used to. But if you were to ask my family, they’d probably tell you the same thing. I have brothers, a sister, and many in-laws who can testify that yes, I’m a transparent person, and there’s usually no guessing how I feel about a subject. I’ve heard it said, “I don’t get ulcers, I GIVE them.” That’s the way “venters” are. We just have to get all the frustration out, then we feel great. Everyone else is in shreds, but, hey, we’re doin’ just fine-what’s YOUR problem????
So, every once in awhile, my frustrations surface, and out it comes. I’m not making excuses, and it’s not what I should be doing. But it’s all about perspective, and that’s why I’m grateful to G and everyone else who helps me balance. There are days I feel like I’m walking a pretty thin tightrope of sanity, but if I can just put one foot in front of the other and walk on, I’ll be okay.
This week and part of next I’ll be screening kindergarteners to determine if the little buggers are ready for first grade. I hope I can keep the germs and viruses at bay while I’m testing. Have a good week all.
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