I'm feeling a little sad this evening. It seems that there's a lot going on in my life, and most of it is because I never thought I'd be in some of the situations I'm in, dealing with some of issues that have presented themselves to me. I feel like withdrawing and just wrapping myself in a covering of some sort so that I am immune or impervious to slings, arrows, and thrown stones. Wouldn't THAT be a great idea? If we could walk around like turtles with shells -we wouldn't get ourselves into messes, (unless we ended up on our backs with our legs flailing around in the air), and, we wouldn't be hurt by what life sometimes brings. Conversely, we wouldn't hurt others with our actions or words if we could just stay in our shells and complete life's minimal requirements, such as bill paying and working for a living.
I sometimes just get weary trying to stay afloat and on course, trying not to crash into hidden rocks. I realize part of this feeling has to do with the fact that there's only a few weeks of school left, and this is my absolute busiest time of the year. But, I also am struggling with more personal things particularly in relationships. When friendships change, when things you thought were sure aren't, when others misunderstand intentions, and when you can't describe or explain how you feel - then a restless, something's off-kilter, something's amiss feeling comes to take up residence. How does one cope?
Monday, April 25, 2011
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Music Speaks
So, I've been learning a new piece on the piano. It's called "Solace" or "Solace Rag" by Scott Joplin. It's not really a rag like you might think, it's slower, deliberate, and full of expression when played properly. I heard this piece played in Century II Concert Hall by a pianist who was featured with the symphony that evening. After a stellar performance of playing technically challenging pieces, for his encore, he sat at the piano, alone, and simply played "Solace". I, along with the rest of the audience, was mesmerized by the beauty of this composition and said to myself that evening, "You will learn to play that!"
Forward several weeks. My son purchased "Solace" online and as I sat at HIS piano one day and plunked it out I discovered that although it may not be extremely difficult to master the technical aspects, what will be difficult will be playing it with feeling and passion in order to evoke an emotional response in myself, and in my audience, should I play it for anyone else.
Daniel gave me the music, so while I practice these notes, I imagine the composer - Scott Joplin - and what might have inspired him to write this simple but beautiful music, which inspires wistfulness, solitude, and a melancholy feeling of yesterdays. This music, as well as Chopin Preludes and Bach Inventions, and even more modern compositions bring me to a state of lowered blood pressure and a different perspective - it uses a different area of the brain than I've used all day, and it is heaven on earth for a little bit. I hope you too can find that place where you can obtain peace of mind and a healing of your spirit. The work day batters and tears, but a place of rest restores. God will meet you there, and He promises to renew your strength for yet another day.
Forward several weeks. My son purchased "Solace" online and as I sat at HIS piano one day and plunked it out I discovered that although it may not be extremely difficult to master the technical aspects, what will be difficult will be playing it with feeling and passion in order to evoke an emotional response in myself, and in my audience, should I play it for anyone else.
Daniel gave me the music, so while I practice these notes, I imagine the composer - Scott Joplin - and what might have inspired him to write this simple but beautiful music, which inspires wistfulness, solitude, and a melancholy feeling of yesterdays. This music, as well as Chopin Preludes and Bach Inventions, and even more modern compositions bring me to a state of lowered blood pressure and a different perspective - it uses a different area of the brain than I've used all day, and it is heaven on earth for a little bit. I hope you too can find that place where you can obtain peace of mind and a healing of your spirit. The work day batters and tears, but a place of rest restores. God will meet you there, and He promises to renew your strength for yet another day.
Saturday, April 09, 2011
Wishes
My wish list, which includes world peace and a chicken in every pot, has been growing recently. Five new additions include the following:
1. A shoe store which carries ONLY wide and double wide shoes. In lots of different styles and colors. And shoes that are cute - not old lady shoes.
2. I need a purse I don't hate. I don't exactly hate my purse, but I'm not fond of it either. It's sorta like an ugly beater car you drive because you have to have transportation.
3. I ardently wish our school district did not have to cut another 15 million out of the budget for next year. The cuts in "phase two" will impact classrooms, support services, and programs. "Phase three" cuts will be even more devastating.
4. Senator Oletha Faust-Goudeau can speed all she wants to. She doesn't have the right to get by with it because she's a senator, because she has a "challenge coin" from Norman Williams, or because she thinks she's being racially profiled. She needs to suck it up and pay her tickets and quit trying to make excuses for her behavior. My wish for her is that she would conduct her personal life more responsibly and with integrity. She also has problems with code violations in housing she owns, but hey, she's a senator! She's busy!
5. I wish young boys and men, from say age 13 to age 40, would pull their pants up. I am in no mood ever to see any sort of underwear on a person, and don't they realize that if they didn't sag, they could actually take normal steps? It's so STUPID! Pull your pants UP! As I said to one gangbanger, "Pull your pants up. Does your mother know you sag like that???" He looked at me as if i were speaking a foreign language. Along with that, I wish larger women would wear bras and moderately longer shorts. I'm tired of seeing tattooes, flab, sag, and fat on people who shouldn't wear tanktops and short shorts. Blech.
1. A shoe store which carries ONLY wide and double wide shoes. In lots of different styles and colors. And shoes that are cute - not old lady shoes.
2. I need a purse I don't hate. I don't exactly hate my purse, but I'm not fond of it either. It's sorta like an ugly beater car you drive because you have to have transportation.
3. I ardently wish our school district did not have to cut another 15 million out of the budget for next year. The cuts in "phase two" will impact classrooms, support services, and programs. "Phase three" cuts will be even more devastating.
4. Senator Oletha Faust-Goudeau can speed all she wants to. She doesn't have the right to get by with it because she's a senator, because she has a "challenge coin" from Norman Williams, or because she thinks she's being racially profiled. She needs to suck it up and pay her tickets and quit trying to make excuses for her behavior. My wish for her is that she would conduct her personal life more responsibly and with integrity. She also has problems with code violations in housing she owns, but hey, she's a senator! She's busy!
5. I wish young boys and men, from say age 13 to age 40, would pull their pants up. I am in no mood ever to see any sort of underwear on a person, and don't they realize that if they didn't sag, they could actually take normal steps? It's so STUPID! Pull your pants UP! As I said to one gangbanger, "Pull your pants up. Does your mother know you sag like that???" He looked at me as if i were speaking a foreign language. Along with that, I wish larger women would wear bras and moderately longer shorts. I'm tired of seeing tattooes, flab, sag, and fat on people who shouldn't wear tanktops and short shorts. Blech.
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