Saturday, March 11, 2017

On the job difficulties - How to gain perspective.

How to gain perspective - that's been my lesson not only this past week, but for many months now as I spend time in a work environment which is frustrating and stressful in many ways. To work where there is no mutual respect, understanding, or trust is to invite lots of issues into your life unless you can develop strategies to deal with such dysfunction.  So here's what I have learned, and am continuing to learn about how to manage this without coming apart at the seams.  I hope this may be helpful to you, but really, I think writing it will be extremely helpful for my own sanity and peace of mind, which brings me to the first bullet point:
  • Peace can and must be obtained by not allowing the circumstances to take control of your outlook.  What destroys calm assurance and confidence is allowing other people's actions to dictate what you will feel, what you will think, and how you will act.  When emotions are stirred, people can quickly become heated, hurtful, or helpless.  None of these is an ideal response in the workplace.
  • Stay out of the drama.  Do your job, but as far as you can, do not participate in unhelpful discussion or negativity.  
  • Be the same person wherever you are.  Don't be hypocritical - you will lose any credibility you once had.
  • Understand what you cannot do.  You cannot nor should you strive to:  change someone else, make someone do something they should do, completely trust someone who has shown themselves to be untrustworthy, or participate in passive-aggressive speech or activities.  Also, you cannot take responsibility for the way someone else performs (or doesn't perform) their job duties.  In your sphere of influence and in the circle of your responsibilities, you make sure all is well with what you are doing but in dealing with people who have no interest in doing their jobs well, let it go.  You can't change it.  
  • Draw strength from others who are positive, supportive, and encouraging, but don't bring them down by whining about your situation.  
  • If your supervisor is dysfunctional, document what you need to, know when you need help and then seek advice, but only from an extremely trustworthy person.  Don't vent to everybody. Not everyone who listens sympathetically is your friend, and you will regret it.  Be careful about who you talk to. 
  • If you cannot work with the dysfunctionality, begin looking for open doors somewhere else. 
  • Take care of yourself.  Fill your soul with what you need in order to survive.  Listen to music, pray, seek God's help, enjoy nature, exercise, refresh your spirit, find grace, focus on being kind.   
I hope this will be helpful to you - it was good for me to write about this.  I hope my situation will be resolved in several weeks and will write more about that as it gets closer.  In the meantime, it's just taking one day, one hour, one minute at a time and not allowing dysfunctional situations/people to steal and rob from me and you what is precious - peace, joy, and purpose in doing a job well no matter what.    

Saturday, February 11, 2017

Time to Post

Good evening.  I started this blog in 2006, and just reviewed some of the postings from the beginning.  Some years I posted a lot, other years, i.e., 2013, I posted only 3 times.  This year may be similar, we'll see.

It's hard to describe how I'm feeling, what I'm thinking, what's going on.  Started on a new drug
for diabetes but I have to confess that I'm so tired of poking myself 4 times daily to check blood sugar and 4 times daily to inject insulin  except for Mondays when I inject medicine 5 times - on Monday I take a 3rd kind of med to help with the out of control blood sugars I'm experiencing.  Thankfully it's only once a week.

I'm tired of watching every single thing I eat, and thinking about how many carbs it has.  I'm tired of always thinking about weight issues, food issues, sugar issues, medicine issues, exercise issues, insulin issues.  It could be worse, I know.  But there are days, I confess, I don't want to deal with it any more.

Well - before I really get to going off on a tangent, I'm heading to bed. I will turn my heart to thankfulness - thankful for home, safety, warmth, family - thankful for God's grace and mercy, and I'm thankful for the ability to work, to volunteer and to enjoy friendships.  Thank you God.


Sunday, January 01, 2017

Post #2

"Beloved Kansas "
"A compilation of pictures and stories of rural and small town Kansas life."

Don't you think that's a great title for a book?

I do.  It's a project in the dream stage.


January 1, 2017

Really.  It's 2017.  Really.  I haven't written a blog post in eons (I think last September).  Why is that, I ask myself.  I enjoy writing.  I've been told I CAN write.  For some reason, I am not able to find time to do so, or perhaps, in all honesty, I have time, but I either don't think about it, or, I feel I have nothing to share.  I have to get over that nobody reads this blog - however, that doesn't really matter to me.  This remains an amazing way to share thoughts and musings - sort of a public diary if you will.  And that constraint is always in my thoughts - it is public.

2017.  I'm looking at retirement in 4 years - perhaps I'll have a few blog posts done by that time.  Every year is presented as a package wrapped up with a bow, and sometimes, the unwrapping is a joyful occasion and sometimes it isn't.  62 years old, and I'm in the 3rd quarter of life (if I live to be 100).  You work all your life for the opportunity to retire and do what you've always wanted to do and for me, that time is fast approaching.

I love my life.  Watching my adult children live their lives, make their own decisions, and yes, even struggle with life is interesting.  The wisdom of my years tells me that without struggle, life is not deep enough, not felt enough, not rich enough, not LIVED enough.  It is so necessary for my kids to go through this, just like I did, and my parents before me.  It's what happens when your kids are middle and older teenagers.  They MUST encounter obstacles and seemingly insurmountable challenges in order to be able to function as adults in this life - and in fact, I wish I would see even at the elementary level more parents willing to let their kids experience natural consequences of life.  Recently a parent of an elementary student was upset at a "D" grade, stating that their child was unable to do grade level work because of poor organizational skills.  This parent expected the school to come up with plan usually reserved for students with disabilities in order to be able to help the child succeed, and, asked the teacher to change the grade to what the child would have earned would this plan have been in place.  I understand organizational challenges - I have them myself - however, the school is not the parent.  Something tells me that there's a lot of parents who are bailing kids out every single day because consequences are one thing they don't want their child to experience.

And don't get me started on parents who complete their child's homework/projects for them.

Off the soapbox - how did I get started on that of all things.  THIS is why I don't blog.  Too much disorganization in my thinking!  For the odd rare reader who finds this blog, may your 2017 be one of growth for you.  Remember to feed your body, feed your mind, and feed your soul - and feed quality nourishment which will help foster maturity.  Blessings to you.

Sunday, September 25, 2016

Just Life

Life handed out some pretty interesting challenges last week and in the midst of all, I thought of the words, "When all around my soul gives way, He then is all my hope and stay."  Do you ever just get so tired that it seems there's never enough rest?  Never enough sleep?  Never enough rejuvenating, rebuilding, renewal?  When we get this far down, it's a long way back up.  It's a long way to see the faint bit of sunlight that remains - and you're just too weary to think about that reach.

I'm just needing to go to bed before I get more morose - I know that in the future I'll read this and wonder what big burden weighed so upon me.  It is enough for now to say it's there, and to say as the hymnwriter, "Even so, it is well, it is well with my soul."

The pressure is enormous - sleep is a relief.  Monday morning comes in a few hours - and may God be us all.

Monday, August 01, 2016

August 1

Well, it's August 1. It's been a busy, sorta weird out of the ordinary summer.  My son got married, which was the BIG thing - so I got to add another daughter to my growing household.  I've had cataract surgery on one eye and am getting ready to have it on the other eye in another week or so.  It's been hot hot hot, garden has not done well.  No tomatoes.  No beans.  A few cukes, a few beets, some potatoes and onions, and that's been about it.

In other minutia:
I heard on the news last night that it's time to start your kids on their new sleep schedules to prepare for the beginning of school, but I've got news for you, it's not only kids that need that, it's me too.  Because I tend to stay up late and then want to sleep late, I've got to get back to going to bed earlier and getting up earlier.  My new schedule has me doing that starting today.

I need to change the frogs' water today - it's starting to reek.  Yes, for some reason I ended up with two African clawed frogs - they've been kind of fun to watch.  Next summer I'm "gifting" them to my brother who has a pond in his back yard - they can grow into monsters there.  But for now, they are just enjoying my little 3 gallon aquarium - which reminds me, I need to buy a net as I can hardly catch them any more and once I do - they are slippery wiggly things I can't hang on to very well.

Family reunion at Rock Springs 4H camp went well.  I appreciated visiting with all I don't get to see very often.  Hug your family today - tell them you love them.

And from this spot in my tiny corner of the world, inhabited by a spouse, aquatic frogs, a struggling garden, kids, kid in laws, and grandkids, I wish you a good day!

Monday, June 27, 2016

Happiness?

I was asked yesterday if I am generally a happy person.  This was followed by an enlightening conversation regarding what happiness is and isn't, examples of who might be happy people, and whether we ourselves thought we were happy in life.  Is happiness the absence of sadness or is it more than that?  Is it a choice?  Are some people just more disposed to be happy than others?  Is it important that we are happy?  Is happiness different than joy or contentment?

I'm afraid no answers were forthcoming, however, it was interesting to think about this.  "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator by certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness..."

I answered the question that I thought maybe I was more of an unhappy person - however, now I'm not so sure that's the case.  There are always things we would like to change, things we would like to be in control of, circumstances which are not ideal.  But somehow, happiness comes anyway, in moments which are both unexpected and fortuitous.

My yard generally makes me happy, but not for several weeks as hot weather has set in, and it needs hours and hours of attention.  This decreases my motivation and my happiness with how things are at the moment- but when I discover a small green tomato on a plant that appears to be thriving anyway - this makes me happy.

Gotta get to work before the heat comes.  Thinking about these things.

Wednesday, June 22, 2016

Questions Not for the Faint Hearted

It's June 22, and about a week and few days out from a mass shooting in Orlando Florida which claimed 49 lives at a nightclub.  Headlines for awhile.  Here in Kansas we've had a shooting recently at a manufacturing plant in Hesston.  And always, the subject of gun control comes around.

I, frankly, am not on either side of this issue.  I can see both sides, and I lean both directions, depending.  I am a partner in life with a man who is solidly in favor of no gun control, so we have had some interesting discussions.  I have a feeling we will never agree on this issue, so we try not to get into it very often.

Gun control is a complex issue, but often both sides will make statements which "nutshell" their positions and appear to offer platitudes regarding what we need to do.  Christians who expound on this topic, either sharing on Facebook or writing blogs or writing articles for Christian journals have widely varying opinions ranging from making all arms available to anyone who wants to buy them to outlawing all firearms everywhere.  And each side uses the Bible and the teachings of Jesus to make their respective points, which I find interesting.  Questions I've never been able to settle for myself on this issue include the following:  The constitution states we have a right to bear arms, but which arms?  Does that include me getting a cannon if my neighbor has a cannon and points it at my house?  Are semi-automatic/automatic guns used in hunting?  What is the purpose of a weapon of this nature?  Are there people better armed than what our police force is?  How would one in a practical way keep guns out of the hands of those who would misuse them, and who knows who that would be?  Would Jesus own a firearm?  If not, why do I need one?  If Jesus would own a firearm would He use it to kill someone if he was protecting a family member?  Would Jesus be a collector of guns? Would He kill a deer and eat it?  Owning a gun implies that you would use it in order to disarm/maim/kill someone who was threatening you in some way.  Can a person who is told to live at peace do that?

So there you go.  Questions about guns at 11:30pm.  I don't know what to do about undocumented immigrants ("illegal aliens") either, but it's too late to think about that.  Everything I think about and hold an opinion of has to go through my filter of - what does the Bible say, what would Jesus do, what do my Christian faith and values tell me, and how do I live as a resident of another kingdom but an alien here in this world - I'm someone who doesn't belong here - this is not my home.  But in the meantime, the question is, to quote philosopher and thinker Francis Schaeffer, "How Shall We Then Live?"