A Public Apology to Miss Pancreas

Apparently, my pancreas reads my blog.  It (she?) became upset about the entry where I expressed my frustration toward her, and, admittedly, I blamed her for not producing enough insulin for me.  I believe I called her “lazy” and I did state (not on this blog, but at other times) that she hasn’t known a good day’s work in several years.  I also insinuated that she put my metabolism in a wheelchair.

Well, I’m SORRY!  SORRY SORRY SORRY!  Little Miss Hoity Toity Pancreas informs me that it isn’t HER fault.  It’s the cells of my body.  She’s producing insulin, (she says, but how can I believe her), but that the cells are not accepting it.  They are “resisting”.  They are stubborn and rebellious.  They are closed-minded and have their gates shut tight.  They passed the Patriot Act a long time ago and not only are they keeping out the terrorists, but they are also keeping out the insulin good guys.  It’s the cells’ problem, not hers.  So, Miss Particular Prissy Pancreas would like an apology.  

Well whatever.  I still think it may be because she’s not producing a quality insulin.  If it were Sterling Silver Grade A Prime Cut Quality Bar None insulin, they’d probably take it.  So now we have an internal war - Miss Pancreas says she’s sending the troops, but the troops are unable to penetrate the borders.  Great.  I gotta make med changes.  It is such a serious situation that I’m being told to increase it four fold.  So now the reinforcements are coming in.  They’re gonna kick down walls, penetrate barriers, storm gates, and open up those bunkers.  And this war will never be over!  Great!