Clerk: They're 100% cotton.
Receptionist: Cotton? That's the stuff that grows on sheep, right?
Clerk: No, cotton comes from rabbits. That's why they're called cottontails.
*************
Regional Director: So our biggest problem last year was we tried to take over the whole world, and the whole world is a big place. We need to think small, concentrate on taking over individual countries first...like Wisconsin.*************
Bookkeeper: What is Susan's last name?
Office Manager: Susan who?
**********
Co-worker: I don't really pay that much attention to politics. I mean, I don't even know the difference between a Republican and a Dominican.
***********
Tech: Okay, now right-click there.
Admin: Here?
Tech: No, right-click. Right there.
Admin: Okay...
Tech: No, get rid of that. Right-click. Right there. Right-click. Right-click...Which button are you clicking?
Admin: The left one.
*********
Office Manager: It's like apples and oranges: they are all the same.
***********
Office worker: The paper coming out of the printer is really hot! It's never been that hot before. Can we do something to cool it down?
Tech: Oh, I forgot! I put the summer paper in there! I'll switch to the winter paper! Give me 10 minutes.
***********
Sales Manager: You are really getting on my nerves today!
General Manager: Good, I can cross that off my list!
***********
Tech on phone: Okay, go ahead and type in your password...Yep, just type it in...In the password field...Just type it...With your keyboard...Should be right in front of you... Has letters on it...Great!
***********
Receptionist: Do you have any extra wireless cords?
***********
Originator: Two charts are just great. Very helpful. Two is a lot more than one.
VP: Yeah, it's like twice as much.
**********
HR #1: Why would anyone agree to take on more responsibility if we're not going to pay them more?
HR #2: We're giving them more projects to work on that will be more advanced than what they're working on right now. I think people look for a challenge and they will be willing to take on more responsibility if it promises to be rewarding. Besides, most of them are in their twenties and need to start somewhere. So you see, we really are paying them more...in experience.
HR #1: Who is ever going to fall for that?
**********
Worker #1: Do you have any time available to meet on Thursday?
Worker #2: It will be pretty tough; I have back to back meetings all day.
Worker #1: How about 11AM?
Worker #2: Okay, I have nothing scheduled at all between 9AM and 5PM.
**********
Co-worker: If I didn't have so much to do, I would get a lot more done.
***********
Employee on phone: Yeah, that's a little redundant.
Boss: You can say that again.
1 comment:
Very good for a cool school psychologist! Thanks for a helping me get a good start to my day.
WDK
Post a Comment